day 89

I hung out with my ex boyfriend tonight.
We got dinner I guess and walked around a crowded mall.

I could only think about the one I am still so passionately in love with
and remember how in love I used to be with this ex boyfriend
and how I am not in love with him anymore
It's only been two years since our high school sweetheart affair
but the feelings are gone

I remember him telling me during our break up
how he wanted to have a car
and a great job
and good grades
to treat me out and just have fun
no parents telling us what to do
just two good kids being young and in love

and tonight
we did exactly that

he drove me around in his car
he bought me dinner
everything was everything I know I deserve

but I'm not in love with him
and I thought I was in love with the idea of being treated like a queen
but I can't help but miss being dirt poor
but being so in love and so happy poor

if only everything could just stay simple all the time

...