day 165

I've taught myself to never fall in love with other poets.*

There are too many writers I want to swim with. I've learned the meaning of ocean through words and voice. The waves I jump with have become familiar with goodbye.
Poets only want to write about love, about falling in love, falling out of love, hard love, sweet love, the moon, the sky, the galaxies, and earthquakes. I have trained my heart to not become a supporting actor in a non fiction novel. There are days I used to yearn the attention of love songs and sad poems. I've grown up and away from this. There are other ways to be loved, I've learned. I do not need a song. I do not need words. I do not need the ouus and the awws from strangers in an audience. I do not feed the urge to be the air exhaled into a microphone.

I love like this however. I love like bad poetry and unrehearsed choruses. I love like forgetting your lines on stage. Like not looking an audience in the eye because I cannot give my heart to strangers anymore. I refuse to scare off hopeless romantics. Love is harsh and honest, but worth it.

I want to write the best love poem. Someday I will wake up after doing somersaults inside of rib cages.