day 200

Reasons Why My Best Friend is My Best Friend

1
You decide to walk home from work sometimes half an hour before midnight
This has sprouted half from the failed attempts at being "friends" with guys
and half from being lazy
You call her on the telephone after fifteen minutes of talking to yourself
She picks up on the first ring
Her voice is a safety net waiting to catch you

2
You refer to yourself as Meryl Streep while gossiping
She laughs because she understands the reference

3
She lives a two minute commute from your home.
One time I skipped class and laid in bed thinking of more reasons to kill myself.
She trotted her way to my room.
I made her lunch and gave her almond milk.
We laughed at all the stupid ways you could die.

4
On the days you don't want to continue dating the guy you're currently dating,
she will hold your hands with your secrets
and all the fears you've told her without opening your mouth.
She will encourage you to
"hang out" with your ex boyfriend if he asks.
She will cry as she sees you cry like you are a ghost and you are all the sadness in the world.

5
On the days you are not the center of the universe,
she will make you feel like all the solar systems exist because of your gravity.
There will always be a tug and pull motion between my soul and my body
and my feet and my dreams,
but she will always remain tugging and pulling
and never pushing away.
There is a reason why your bones feel most at home in her presence.

6
On the days I've spent in bed
contemplating ways to kill myself,
she has found a way to distract me. To tug and pull
and never push away.
She is the reason the solar system exists.
The reason why the tides dance smoothly during full moons in July.

7
She will watch you get your heart broken,
break other people's hearts,
and she will always reassure you that these things just "happen."

8
On the days I've kept myself in complete solitude for so long,
I lose count of all the reasons to continue to tug and pull
and watch the solar system exist.
It feels like a million seconds of not being able to breathe.
I call her and she picks up
on the first ring.
We gossip and I call myself Meryl Streep.
I ask, "Is it wrong that I don't feel bad for the things I do?
I feel like I should, but I just can't...
Do you think I'm just evil?"
She will laugh and tell you to calm down.
"No. These things just happen.
You're perfectly fine."